I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
