If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
