there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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