I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
