When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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