erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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