Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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