He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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