I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize