Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
