Pappa wants mamma naked
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
