I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
