During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
