apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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