FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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