What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
