bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Small penises have feelings too.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
