So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize