I CAN MOONWALK!
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
