I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
