I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You made out with two different species that night
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
