I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
no more duck duck goose at the bar
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
