do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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