apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
