you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
