you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
