I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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