so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
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