next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
