Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Can I color on your dick again?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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