didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize