I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
