she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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