found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
