ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
