I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
