so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize