Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
