I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
it glows. i had to have it.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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