at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
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