thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i out mim tonsoeep
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