By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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