my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
