Got a toothbrush?
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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