at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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