I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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