I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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