If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I think your dad took our porno
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I am mentally ready for anal.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize