Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
