I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
