Dual....:-)
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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