I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
